My Job, yes, You Should be Jealous

Lately I've been obsessed with my running and training for the Percy... it's all I think about (or so it seems).
And why not?  What an adventure!  I tingle deep down with excitement just thinking about it.  After all the dogs and I will be running a small section of the Yukon Quest trail... *squeal!!*

As for my running, that also has me excited.   I never thought I could be a runner... and here I am in less than a month almost ready to run a 5K without stopping.

Who woulda figured at this point in my life at 48 years old I would be heading for an incredible adventure and in the best shape ever.

However that is not all that is happening in my life.
It is as if everything is falling into place.   The jigsaw puzzle of who I am is filling in nicely, the picture is clear now, and it makes me smile.
The section that is finally crystal is my job.
I LOVE my job.   It is one that I am re-hired for yearly and I cross my fingers that I will return for many more to come.

The staff, my co-workers, are an amazing group of people that take their work seriously.  It makes me feel so incredibly overwhelmed to think that my kids were educated in this atmosphere, but also opened my eyes to how and why they ended up where they have today.... I've got to say that we are incredibly lucky in this small town to have a fabulous group of dedicated teachers from K to 12.

My job. 
I go to work daily knowing that I will smile often.  I enjoy the children I work with, they are able to baffle me and some will challenge me, yet they all amaze me. 
I get to be a mentor yet at the same time am able to act silly and be goofy if the situation allows for it.  It's like being paid to be a Girl Guide leader and I LOVE it!!

Speaking of which... I'm off to get ready for a super, wonderful incredible day now... and it begins with a run which means it will be a perfect one.

What to do? What to do?

"That's me"

Suppose you could chock it down to that simple two word sentence.

Simple?  Sadly no.

I'm so confused and need some help trying to figure things out.  Perhaps help is just in writing my words down or hearing what others think and sorting my thoughts this way.. or it could be I need a light to go off and a terrific 'ah ha!!' to pounce upon me one morning.
In any case I just have no idea what I should do.

I thought I knew, right up until driving home on my own with only my thoughts running through my head.
A sudden realization hit me, one that has changed what I should or shouldn't do.

I have this most amazing job, one that has left me with the feeling of winning the lottery.  Everything about the job is perfect.
So then why am I looking at leaving in the fall to head out and begin something new?
Yes it would lead me to doing something that would end up being perfect..... or would it?

I would be leaving this wonderful job... and although I could be back (hopefully) to do my practicum, I doubt I would end up working here... and I personally know 2 in this profession that are not doing what they want as there just is no work in this area.
AND I would be 4 years older, which is old to be heading out into a new career.

So now I'm back to square one, where I sat almost 10 years ago... only now I'm 10 years older.

Should I just upgrade?  Get the learning bug out of me this way?  And stay in my perfect job?
or
Should I throw caution to the wind and move on? 

Arrrgggg.... I just don't know what to do anymore.

I'm so confuzzled.

Moving Monstrosity

For those who have never been in my hubby's shop this wont mean much.... however for those who have ever moved too much stuff in a short amount of time... it might just set off long forgotten back spasms...here I will share a few photo memorabilia of our pain and suffering from a very long weekend.

I'm just sorry I forgot to pull the camera out and take pics of those who helped us yesterday.... but I am not sure you can physically take photos of angels.

Moving back home.  Nothing is where is should be at the moment... just trying to fit it inside at the moment. Organizing will come at a later date.

Where should we put it?  Put it in the portable!!!

The rack, a bit shorter and now sitting in the driveway waiting to be put IN the portable which still needs sides or tarps or something.... there is always something.

Done for the day!!! Hubby is wondering when Rigby will be handing out back massages, by the look on his face I would say not any time soon!

Done Like Dinner

I put a resume out for a job that I really REALLY wanna have.

I probably wont hear from anyone about it until sometime next week.
It is not guaranteed, and as they start the re-hiring for the upcoming new year I sit at the bottom of the totum pole un-sure that the call will even come.

Yet with all that uncertainty I still left my current job.
There needed to be new staff in place before I left and it could be a last minute walk away... so as I'm such a nice person I resigned ages ago...
I finished training my replacement yesterday and walked out into the world of unemployment.

I'm so scared, we are already cash strapped as it is and now I have no income!!
Well I suppose that is not entirely true..... I deliver flowers, scoop ice cream, and am doing enumeration starting next Friday..... I still have room for odd jobs if anyone is looking to hire for random hours.... and my new job (being ever so optimistic) doesn't start until September sometime.. if it's the job I want then the second week I believe.

Yet with all that uncertainty I still feel pretty proud of myself.  To be able to make a life changing decision and then act on it, knowing that I could be left open to look for something new, it's kinda exciting actually.

I will miss my 'kiddo' she was an adorable sweetheart and the last couple of months we had a blast together... lots of giggling going on in that stupid car (I hated driving in the end)

Crowded House

It is much too crowded here these days.

I just cannot get a moments peace!

Need and MustDo the twins are driving me insane with their constant whining. No matter how hard I've tried I just cannot seem to get away from them..... they even follow me into the bathroom!!  The worst is that they keep me up at night ~ sigh.

Want has also been nagging at me lately pushing me to do things that Need and MustDo get very upset about, it has become a three way battle and unfortunately the twins seem to be winning leaving Want very sad. After these little tiffs I usually spot Wish sitting in the corner looking rather forlorn, it is a sorry state of affairs as Wish has been ignored an awful lot lately.

But what has made life really really difficult is that the cousin that has come to spend some time with us has really made it very unbalanced these days, especially this weekend. NotRightNow has been a terrible influence over me with his parents Lazy and Procrastination not being any help at all in the matter.

Perhaps with a new week upon us I will be able to find it in my heart to open the door and let GetterDone stop in for a quick tea.

Thanks for the Memories

I sit here.... suppose to be doing paper work (sigh, it will never leave will it?)
I sit here... remembering...... the past 6 years.

I've had so many special people enter my life 'because' of these last six years.  I have made friends all from a cup of coffee... special friends.
Good friends who I am hoping to know throughout the rest of my days.

I feel blessed, so much, more than anyone can imagine.  And it brings a lump to my throat... I feel by walking out that door that I will be leaving you all, and I now understand what you all mean when you say "it won't be the same"
Mugs will always be the same, but we will miss each other.
We shall meet at another place, another time, and maybe it will be Mugs for a coffee with me at the table instead of behind the counter or pehaps at my new job, wherever that may be.

For now memories are what we have, Good Times and we will never forget each other... names may be forgotten, but the memories will not.

Music has been an important part of my life, and I am so glad that I was able to share that part of me through Mugs.... and for all of you that have come out to enjoy and give a big part of yourself I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I also hope that you will all continue this great evening of entertainment... as I plan to attend as many as possible.. but from the comfort of the seat as a customer.

I've not only been given the gift of music... but have been given pictures drawn for me from young children, a special bean from a special friend (no not drugs), dog bones to share with my babies, flowers, and plants from your very own gardens, decor that added that special touch, your hard work and sweat when we renovated, your patience while we closed when we renovated, and most importantly, I was given the gift of friendship.

Thank you everyone for the most wonderful six years I could have ever imagined... but it is time for me to leave now....  I wont be far.... promise

Don't get me wrong

4:00 am

Now don't get me wrong it's not that I don't like you, in fact you could be my favorite time of day... IF I could sleep through you.
I am so tired, yet my eyes remain open, my brain alert.

Paper work

Now don't get me wrong it's not that I don't like you...... who am I kidding? I hate you.
I'm looking forward to not having anything to do with you.  Your like that creepy uncle who you have to put up with at family gatherings, you show up drunk and obnoxious putting on some loud show that is hard to ignore.
We all try to pretend your not there, but it's hard to look away too.

Stress

Now don't get me wrong, it's like this..... I wish you would go away!!!!
Does anyone like stress???
I must... why would I keep avoiding the paper work?  Why else do I leave things to the last minute?  I must enjoy these sleepless nights?  This feeling of impending doom that lurks inside my very soul.

Time

You go way too fast when I need you.  Perhaps you don't like me?  I'm not sure what I did to make you not want to hang around... I'm a good person and if you just gave me a chance I know you would stick around.

It's Murder I say

The weekend finally arrived.

A time of renewal for the soul and the mind.

I don't go out and do dog chores as early, waiting for the sun to shine on the darkened earth damp from the melting snow. The dogs are a little impatient at first letting me know with a few tested howls, but they settle down when they too realize it's the weekend and it is a morning of sleeping in and laziness.

Time to curl up on the couch wrapped in my fleecy blanket as we await the arrival of the daylight. Computer on my lap open to the Iditarod web site and that Crackbook site where I can legally stalk all my friends.

I should make coffee.... nope.... I'm not at work, I don't do coffee making outside of the store.

It is dark with the exception of the light coming off of the monitor, blinding me as to what is around the room. Suddenly the quiet overwhelms me, not even the hum of the computer helps this feeling of unease.

Something is out there beyond my false light, something not right.

There to my right just ahead of me is a shadow,,,, did it just move?

Don't be silly, the doors are locked, there is nothing here but my imagination.

No, there IS something there. I should look, if anything to rest my mind.

Slowly I rise from my warm nest turning on the light.

That is when it jumped out and knocked me over, the weight of it's huge body over powering me. I was helpless to get it off, panic setting in as the heaviness began to suffocate me.

Go Away I scream, but my pleas of freedom fall on deaf ears.

If I just lay still maybe it will leave.

Alas, it does not, it just gets heavier the longer we lay here.

The closeness makes me cringe, and I feel tears threatening to spill from my eyes. Why will it not leave me alone?

I am pretty sure that it is whispering in my ear, but I refuse to listen... No! NO!

It is the weekend!! Leave me alone!!

I want to go out tonight, I want to not think of you... how did you find me anyway??

It was with these last words that I finally gave in, watching my weekend die, a slow horrible painful death.

I will get you paper work!! If it is the last thing I do.