Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Who Said Being A Mom Was Easy?

I`m a mommy.

What does that mean exactly?

Exactly?   I carried my children in my womb for 9 months - although if you want to be exact and technical that has nothing to do with being a mommy either.  There are many woman out there who carry a child within their bodies and for reasons too numerous to get into here the child is taken with love into another home which then transforms someone else into a mommy...

So exactly?  How about the lack of sleep that comes with caring for a new born (sleep like a baby, my ass).  Or sleepless nights hovering over a sick toddler or young child.... and again the sleepless nights when your teenager takes the car out with his/her friends for an evening... and once again as a young adult when they take off to adventures and do not respond to texts leaving you wondering if they are okay..

However it is not just lack of sleep that makes a mommy ... but you now have a mental picture.
What about the skills one gains as a mommy.
Let me explain.

I can say with confidence that I have the ability to walk into any hospital and take on the role of nurse.  I have experience in, but not limited to:
split foreheads (twice), stitches, scraped knees, deep splinters, high fevers, broken arms (twice again), various bodily fluids, removal of tonsils, respiratory distress syndrome, broken fingers, bruises, sprains, ear infections, throat infections, fingers caught in machines not meant for human body parts, and many other ailments that this tired mommy brain has chosen to bury deep within the memories.

Psychologist as I have dealt with broken hearts, depression, anger, in general mood swings that could rival anyone who is labeled extreme bipolar (those with teenager girls will know what I am talking about).

Guidance Councilor when the kids began the decision process of what they want to be when they grow up which starts at about age 4 and carries on well into adulthood (heck I`m still trying to figure that one out myself!!)

Chaperon/Taxi Driver... well this one needs no description other than adding... music lessons, karate, football, Guides, Cubs, Dogsled Races, School field trips, band trips, honour band, field hockey, baseball, etc. etc. etc.

Then there is teacher, personal assistant, executive chef,  housekeeper, accountant, computer operator... should I go on or does this sum it up nicely?
We all know this, it's been written in many blogs before mine, it is even recorded in child rearing books.  Books written on "How to..." from infant to the teenage years.  I'm serious, if you say there is no handbook on raising a child, I dare you then to go to Chapters and walk down the isle on parenthood... wow is all I can say.  You should see all the books out there... from raising a genius to raising a child with some incurable disease, kids who are perfect to kids who have social disorders... it's all there...
If you read them all then heck fire, you could have any kid and know what to do perfectly!!


In any case, I did it the Au natural way.  Used my head and intuition.  Listened to my heart more than my head and followed the strings that attach me and my kids.
For those who don't know what I mean I explained the strings in a previous blog here.

There is one aspect of raising kids that I don't think is written in a 'how to' book.. and that is the part when they leave.
What it will feel like, how much it hurts... the strings pull and tug and rip and stretch... and it does physically hurt the heart.

I had someone recently say, you have to let them spread their wings.
Heck yes, I had no intention of them hanging around this little town they were raised in, I myself do not want to be here forever.
It has nothing to do with letting them fly on to new adventures, in fact I encouraged it.  It has everything to do with how quickly time passes us without a warning.

One day I'm sitting with my kids with me while we watch Disney on tv.. go to a water park .. or set up tents or movie theaters in the living room and play make believe to having to let them leave in an old beater of a car that they plan to drive across the Country in and build a new life with very little money and lots of fun and adventure.... or to finish up school a few thousand miles away with no direction other than to move to Amsterdam in the next couple of years.
Both of them so far away with their dreams.

It is the suddenness of the whole thing that hurts the most.

Empty Nest? 
Yes they have both spread their wings, if that is how we want to say it, and have flown on to their own lives far from home.

Here I will stay, for now, always here for them when they need a hand, an ear, a shoulder... any body part and it is theirs for them at any time.... and they know it.

A page in life has been turned and a new chapter revealed.... however I place the book mark in the center and close the book.
Not yet, I'm not ready to read on... let me take a moment to look back and swim in the memories first.


ainnirbard said...

I'm not a mom, but I think it's a very well written piece!!

Insomnia said...

Thanks ainnirbard! I've been trying to post on your blog, going so far as to trying different computers.. but I'm not allowed.. very odd.
I loved your counting game blog.. very funny, unless there was a vet bill included, sill dog.

ainnirbard said...

No vet bill thank goodness...Turin took care of that this month (my garbage eater - upset tummy dog!). So far the stone don't seem to hurt Gambit, but I really wish he'd stop!

That is very odd. I'll check my settings, but I don't remember hitting any random or restricting buttons!